Mike’s lesson brought changes into view With putting the object of review. He replaced his old poke With a new smoother stroke And tied my ‘dot’ record twenty two.

Jeffery’s game is [...]]]> I thought that Mike might stumble after his swing coach, Joey, moved to Bend, Oregon but then along comes Stevie to give him a putting lesson and…

Mike’s lesson brought changes into view
With putting the object of review.
He replaced his old poke
With a new smoother stroke
And tied my ‘dot’ record twenty two.

Jeffery’s game is on fire from tee to…..the middle of the fairway. Anywhere near the green and the demons are set loose. We’ve a new phrase for when you’re around the green in two and walk off with a seven…”he sure Jeffery’d that hole!”.

Jeff’s tee ball we’ve started ignoring
Though straight down the middle they’re soaring.
Until he lays claim
To a better short game
They won’t do much good for his scoring.

One of our playing partners said he used to be called ‘twinkle toes’ with a soccer ball. Given his current ’stature’ I had trouble reconciling that…and it certainly didn’t carry over to his golf game. That said, he’s good company and knows his beer!

He claimed a nickname ‘twinkle toes’
From the soccer ball skill that he shows.
But with a golf ball
He’s not that at all,
His twinkle is sprinkled with woes.

We’ll be off on our annual Myrtle Beach golf extravaganza next week. Nothing but eating, sleeping and golfing with occasional forays into town to uncover entertainment (note to wives, it’s just Bingo).

It’s Myrtle time first week of June
Where we golf whether sun or monsoon.
With mornings sedate
After lunch we create
A golf  ‘party’ round afternoon.

Mark hit a good shot into the par 3 [...]]]> Beautiful weather for golf this weekend! The only thing more stunning was the golf attire. Jeffery was looking dapper in new duds thanks to a gift-certificate-at-the-pro-shop prize, and Mark had on some wild-ass fluorescent color you only wear when you dress in the dark. Limericks for all!

Mark hit a good shot into the par 3 16th……

His shot from the tee box conveyed
A left to right path as a fade.
A birdie with dots
To follow that shot?
For sure…if the putt had been made.

Jeff not only had new duds but lessons as well…..

From a tourney, Jeff brought new techniques
For his short game that needed some tweaks.
He played well today
But it’s almost cliché
He’ll forget in another two weeks.

And the other Mike? Well…he was out dressed and outplayed…..

Mike’s game was as rough as his stubble
With his match sinking deep into trouble.
Each hole over par,
As his putts missed so far
That he must have been seeing things double.

And finally, another offer to play Boulder Ridge but I have a schedule conflict…..

I thank you for the offer to play
And it grieves me in having to say,
Though your course is pure bliss
I’m afraid I can’t miss
My proctology exam that day.

A new chipper Jeffery did bring With hope that his short game would sing But the song sung blue With another 92 It’s back to his flop shot swing.

An old golfer friend named Jeff Would swing his club hard from the left The fairways he hit But his short game was [...]]]> Here are some limericks inspired by Jeffery, friend and golf buddy extraordinaire…

A new chipper Jeffery did bring
With hope that his short game would sing
But the song sung blue
With another 92
It’s back to his flop shot swing.

An old golfer friend named Jeff
Would swing his club hard from the left
The fairways he hit
But his short game was shit
Thus his score was always bereft.

I had 10 dots and a birdie
But the rest of my game wasn’t sturdy
With my swing gone astray
Suffice it to say
A 92 don’t look so purdy.

His ball in the sand was no need
To remember his lessons or heed
Any advice that might help
So he let out a yelp
And threw his wedge into the reeds.

The following limerick was authored by Jeffery…

“A pal and a friend” they all said
When he couldn’t play golf  ’cause it led
To a pain in his back
So quickly they sacked,
Replaced him and left him for dead.

The par five was short, so I think I can get there in two in a blink But the next shot was hairy And my ball wouldn’t carry So I ended [...]]]> You don’t want your golf ball to land
Smack dab in the middle of sand
To the pros it looks easy
But I just get queasy
Knowing bogey or worse is at hand.

The Bridges is brutal to play
With every mistake you’ll pay
A little or a lot
Depends on the shot
But you’re gonna get screwed either way.